2003 STORIES...

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Editor Jim Lockwood

ICQ # 1850917
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Monday, April 7, 2003
Story by Marty Polanski

HONOLULU (AP) - Reporter Charles Polanski has been tracking the Volcanos during the offseason. Due to their poor 2002 season quite a bit of tension is palpable in the clubhouse.

"Who the F does that McGwire over in the so-called Major Leagues think he is! If I have to hear anymore about him and his buddy Sosa I will waste money on each of their overpriced rookie cards and personally puke over them!"
-- Dante Bichette, DH Honolulu Volcanos

"What's the world coming to! The freaking L.A. Riots win a championship let alone a division! They once were the Lisbon Squid for crying out loud! I'm gonna bust some balls next season!!!"
-- Jim Edmonds, CF Honolulu Volcanos

"I thinka this team a needsa motivational tool. I think I once againa legalize cannibalism in my Hawaiian Islands and see how dat will get my boys fired up. In case they screw uppa the fans might find a new tasting hot dog in the stadium! I will tell em that the godess Pele is not as forgiving as Kamehameha."
-- King Kamehameha, Manager Honolulu Volcanos

"You want my opinion of the White Sharks. I'll tell you what my *&$(^%@ opinion is. I think the WhiteSharks are *&$%@! What did you think my $%&*@ opinion of the $%&*@ WhiteSharks is! Get out of my face..."
-- Charles Polanski, Owner Honolulu Volcanos in front of a crowd of reporters at a pre-Free Agent Draft press conference in Los Angeles.

More quotes to come in coming days...

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